Author: Dan

Those are the words I use to describe an event that occurs in my life which is simply “too good to be true” or  which I think are “totally unbelievable”, but have taken place before my very eyes.

Time for a story…

Windy and I have been looking for a house. Our needs are very specific. As we are planning on moving her parents in with us, we require enough space so as to not feel cramped, but not so much that the place is impossible to keep clean. We prefer a single story house without stairs, at least 4 bedrooms, a fair amount of yard space,  etc.  Oh, and we also need a buyer for her parents’ house as well as someone to buy our place. And of course our new house needs to be “reasonably priced, centrally located, everything we could ever want in a house and more”.

Well, first thing we did was start praying. We truly believe God will provide for all our needs to matter how big or small. We just needed to ask. We prayed every day. We prayed consistently every day.  We believe “there’s no such thing as too much prayer”. We prayed “that when this whole thing happens that it goes quickly & easily…”  trusting that God would open all the doors and we would simply walk through them.

So, we started reviewing realty sites for Open Houses. We hadn’t decided between building on an empty lot, buying a previously owned house, or buying new construction; but as we searched for land on which to build, it became apparent we weren’t going to find the acreage that met our requirements. So, one “option” was taken off our list. Or as we said “one door shut by God”.

Since our needs were pretty specific, we continued attending Open Houses every opportunity – whether it was a 1 or 2 story wasn’t important – as long is met most of our “laundry list”. Very time consuming, but the more houses we toured, the clearer our “vision of our needs” developed and changed.

After viewing many homes, it became apparent what we really wanted was a single story house with a huge kitchen with an island that was open to a large great room big enough to host the entire family for holiday dinners etc. Add to that 4 bedrooms and a decent sized yard and “voila” we’d have the perfect house.

But did it exist?

Days became weeks and weeks became months. We were beginning to wonder if we’d ever find “the” house. It’s not that we were frustrated, it’s just that we were. We decided to attend yet another Open House “just because”. It was a nice two story with a master on main, but again, not quite what we were looking for…

Ah, but across the street were perhaps what we were seeking – newer single story houses on reasonable sized lots, backing to a grove of trees, but none of them were for sale. The agent showing us the 2 story said the single levels sold out fast and wished the builder had built more of them “…because that’s what buyers want right now.”

Then “scary good” began to happen…

One of the single story houses on that street we had talked about with the agent went up for sale! An Open House was scheduled for the next Saturday. So, obviously we made plans to check it out. Also, a second single level home cross-town had caught our eye and it had an Open House Saturday too! Thus, we would be able to do a “side-by-side” comparison.

Saturday arrived, and so did we – at the 1st Open House. It was a wonderful house. I was “ready to sign on the dotted line”. It “felt right” instantly and “felt righter” as we wandered through the rooms. We thought this was “the” house, maybe, as we still had the 2nd Open House to attend.

The agent sensed our interest and the small talk began. Windy began telling her our “story” and then the agent interrupted Windy by saying,  “I have been working with a couple for months who are looking for a house in your parents’ neighborhood…blah blah blah.  Would it be “ok” for me to stop by your parent’s house after this Open House ends and look around? I have a pretty good idea what my clients want. “But of course,” we respond. We then tell her we haven’t done much sale prepping so the house might not look the nicest…blah blah blah.

Details were exchanged. We parted ways and headed to the 2nd house. It was a slight letdown after seeing “the” house; so on our way back into town we decided to swing by the parent’s place to pick up Dixie and show her “the” house.

We return with Dixie and she also liked “the” house. More small talk ensued, ending with a time for the agent to view Dixie’s house. So, again,  we all go our separate ways. Oh man, we really wanted that house!

Later that same evening, Dixie called and said the agent liked what she saw. The agent in turn had called the couple she had been working with to have them come view Dixie’s house. After seeing Dixie’s house, the other couple were curious as to its price!

That Monday,  Dixie accepted an offer for her house – without it ever being listed! We placed an offer on “the” house. Oh, and we found (ok, God sent) someone to buy our residence!

Three things that needed to happen, happened. Quickly & easily. Prayers answered.

“Scary Good”, right?

Ah, but it gets better (Scary Gooder maybe?)…

Combining two households has not been easy. Many “big” items like dressers, book cases, dining room tables, couches, love seats, automobiles, bedroom sets, washers & dryers, etc needed to be sold..which meant we needed buyers – and lots of them!

Prayed some more, asking God to provide – AND HE DID!

Windy posted many of the items on an online marketplace. Her phone “blew up” with responses!  All that remains to be sold is an entertainment center, a roll-top desk, and a sewing table.

Maybe I shouldn’t have been so surprised that God answered our prayers.

Why?

Because God is Scary Good!

“The” house.

Well, it’s getting to be that time of the year again. The time when I pack up a few pair of shorts, shirts, golf shoes and balls in preparation for the annual golf outing I have with my family in North Carolina. The days are full of golf, laughter, and just plain ol’ fun. The problem is the days are too short (and include about 12 hours of golf), fly by too quickly (although they are still 24 hours in length),  and ends just when “it’s getting good” (not so much the golf, but the “being together-ness”).

The outing is full of joy: My younger brother might even go as far as to say the outing is “joy defined” or even “a bit of heaven on earth”.

The outing is “simple”: We eat breakfast. Golf. Grab a “hotdog all the way” (a hotdog with everything plus chili and coleslaw – about every 2 hours). Eat dinner. Golf a little more. Relax with adult beverages on the porch in rocking chairs and talk. Go to bed. Repeat every day. Simple!

The outing is a chance to live life unencumbered from the things of daily life:  No stress from work or home. It’s just guys being guys doing guy stuff that guys do.

Maybe it “works” because we are family and “know each others’ baggage”. No need to feel or be defensive. Sure, we “poke” at known “sore spots” just to get a reaction from one another, but all-in-all, it’s just a time filled with good clean fun.

Why can’t the other 51 weeks of the year be the same?

Simple answer – “Fear”

We have nothing to fear during the outing. We’ve been going to the same location for 25+ years now, so we “know” the golf course, staff, and surrounding area; which means we are comfortable being who we are, where we are. We “know” what they’ll be serving for breakfast and dinner because “they always have”. In short, we know what to expect because we have learned what to expect from the many prior trips.

That’s why the other 51 weeks are different. We  simply don’t know what to expect; which enables fear to enter and take control of our life.

I was reading a sports column written a few days after the completion of The Masters golf tournament at Augusta National. For those of you that don’t know, the tournament host draws names from the writer’s pool via a lottery. Winning the lottery allows “the chosen few” to play the course on Monday just as it was set for the professionals on Sunday; except it is played from the shorter Member tees, not the lengthy Professional tees. I understand it is quite the privilege.

As I continued reading the article, it became abundantly clear the writer’s golf skills were nominal, so much so that every year he hoped his name would not be drawn. However, his name was drawn this year and as such, he was full of trepidation i.e FEAR before attempting his Monday round.

I won’t share the details of his round, but allow me to share his words in closing:

“Places like Augusta will be around for a long, long time. But we might not be. We’ve all got an Augusta lurking in the back of our minds, something we haven’t done, something we’ve been scared to attempt. Maybe it’s not playing a golf course — maybe it’s singing in public, or cooking for friends, or writing that novel.

But the fear paralyzes us. We dodge, we avoid, we find excuses not to do what we ought to be doing. And once we start it, it’s almost never as bad as we fear … and sometimes, it can be much better. Sometimes, it can even be transcendent.

Find your Augusta. Tee up high. Take a deep breath. And enjoy every swing.

While driving my wife, Windy, to the Portland airport from McMinnville (about an hour’s drive)  at 3:30am on a rainy Thursday morning, I was pulled over by a Portland police officer about 5 minutes from my destination. As I pulled over and waited for the officer to walk to my window, I wondered what I had done to get his attention. Yes, it was dark, rainy, and maybe I was going a little fast. Maybe it was because when I exited the off ramp I had issues with choosing a lane. Oh, well, I was stopped and would surely find out shortly.

Well, when the officer arrived, not at my window, but at Windy’s, his first words were “I’ve been on patrol since 10am yesterday morning so…” Then he explained that I had failed to signal on several lane changes, and that with the rain there might be standing water, so I might want to watch my speed as I was traveling at 65 mph and that I didn’t want to be “that guy”, you know, the “guy” we all complain about the way he’s driving in weather like this. He then walked back to his patrol car with my license and said he’d return in a few minutes.

Fortunately, I did not receive a ticket. He praised my driving record – one ticket for running a red light caught on an automatic “red light camera” like 7 years ago, and said to just pay attention to the weather, road conditions, and speed I was driving. Nothing’s worth risking our safety and my good driving record.

So, after I exhaled I said, “Thank you God for not giving me a ticket.” I then dropped Windy at the airport and returned home.

It was only later that I put 2 and 2 together and thought –

“Isn’t God a lot like that police officer?” Let me explain…

The job of a police officer is to enforce the laws. If you obey the laws, your interactions with the police are generally because you seek them or need them for something  – like when you have a traffic accident or are lost and need directions. Now, when you break the laws (that is, stray from the path) and are stopped by an officer, it’s their duty to inform you of the error in your way and get you “back in line” with the laws. Sometimes there are fines. Sometimes there are warnings, but either way you’ve been made aware of your mistakes, change your behavior and “fall back in line” again.

Our God works the same way!

In life, we’re all on a path. We don’t know where it is going. We don’t know where it will lead us. All we know is that if we stay on the path God has for us, we’ll be “ok”.

So, what do we do?

We’re only human (and full of sin), so we stray from His path. We are such idiots!

But, what does He do?

He allows us to wander, far and away from Him and His path for us.. We may wander for days, weeks, months or even  40 years like Moses, but He never stops loving us or supplying our needs. He knows we’ll return to Him. He knows we’ll discover we need Him.  And you know what – He will be there, with arms wide open ready to embrace us like we had never left.

Amazing, isn’t it?

It’s called “grace”. God has more grace “allotted” for you than you’ll ever need.

How much grace do you exercise towards your fellow man?

How would imparting grace into the life of those around you affect not only you, but them?

Grace is like sugar – a little bit goes a long way.

Sweeten someone’s life today; show them a little grace.

Failure.

Ask as  child what they want to be when they grow up and you’ll probably receive a million different answers. One you certainly won’t receive is “failure”. Nobody wants to be a failure.

Why? What is so frightening about “failure”?

Everyone, and I do mean everyone, fails.

• Thomas Edison failed 10,000 times prior to finding the correct material for his lightbulb filament
• The best passer in the NFL, Drew Brees, failed on 26% of his pass attempts
• The best hitter in MLB, Mookie Betts, failed on 67% of his trips to the plate

So again, what is so frightening about failure?

Nothing should frighten us concerning failure. Failure can be overcome.

But how?

Ya gotta keep on keeping on. Keep on trying.

When a baseball player like Mookie Betts “gets in a slump”, he doesn’t “give up” swinging. He watches video, asks a coach or teammate for advice, or takes extra practice. He may even ask to bat in a different spot in the batting order.

When golfers “lose their touch on the green”, they too, consult a coach, practice more, or maybe even switch out their putter to improve their confidence.

Do you see? They do something, anything, rather than accept their current state.

That’s how you avoid failure – you take action to change your status!

Ah now, the best part of all this is –  the action you take is all up to you.

You can choose to take whatever action you think will bring you the outcome you desire. You can read a book, talk to a friend, or search the internet. If  those don’t work (fail) you can always try a different book, friend, refine your search, or try something totally different. You have an infinite number of attempts to succeed but only a finite amount of time.

How badly do you want to beat it?

What’s holding you back?

Go! Beat today’s failures today, so you can have a better tomorrow, tomorrow.

Life has a way of keeping us busy, actually, too busy I’d say. How many times have you heard a friend or family member say, “Sorry, I can’t blah blah blah because my plate is already too full and I just don’t know where I’d find the time…” or something similar?

My guess would be “too many”. How did that response make you feel? Did you question whether or not the person even listened or heard your request? Did you feel your request was simply “brushed aside” or  given little or no consideration?

We’re all guilty of this behavior, aren’t we? And you know what, we need to change this to benefit our friends, family and ourselves. I truly believe it will make you a better person.

Okay, but how?

Glad you asked.

Begin by examining what’s on your plate.

Ask yourself…

“How large is my plate? Should I have a smaller/larger plate? Maybe I should have two plates?”

“Why is this on my plate? Did I put it there or did someone else tell me it would be good for me”? If someone else put in in your plate, why did you accept it?

“Is this taking up too much of my plate? Why’d I take so much?”

“Can I give up something on my plate to make room for something else? Should I?

“Is my plate balanced? Are there items I dislike that will help me grow as well as items I like that I can simply enjoy?”

…and I’m sure you came up with many more.

Folks – life is like a smorgasbord – a never-ending, wonder-filled buffet of goodness. Travel the buffet line too quickly and, odds are, you’ll miss something you wanted and by the time you realize (if you ever do), it’ll be too late to go back.

Ya gotta slow down, be still, as it were, and take full advantage of the buffet. Protect what is important to you. Make time for what’s important to you. Prioritize what is important to you.

Remember: Be still. Seek, ask and receive from His great buffet. It’s all laid out, waiting for you.

Never in a million years did I ever think I’d be writing a blog entry based upon nuts, but yet, here I am doing just that very thing. I must be nuts! If you asked my wife, I am sure she would confirm that for you.

So, how did I get to this point?

I’ll try to keep it short. I work at a monastery bakery making fruitcakes. It’s a very, very manual process – no automation what-so-ever, just a big ol’ floor mixer, industrial oven and lots of cake pans and rolling tables. Pretty much everything is done manually by the monks and myself. Once the batter is mixed, it is scooped into the pans (by hand), leveled in the pan (by hand) and the cake decorated with pecans and cherries (by hand) – like I said, a very manual and time consuming process.

So, where do the decorator pecans originate? The pecans (whole, shelled) arrive at the bakery in 30 lb boxes. Whenever we need decorator pecans, we pull out a box. Simple, right? Well, not really. You see, the pecans are described as “whole” but during shipping some of them break, so before we can use a box, the pecans need to be sorted into “broken” and “whole”.

So, guess what my “job” was for today? Yup, I was the decorator pecan sorter. And that is how I got the inspiration for this blog entry.

What was it about the mundane task of sorting pecans that inspired me? Actually, I’m not really sure. I found myself thinking, “none of the nuts are wasted. The ‘broken’ nuts are put into a container and then used as an ingredient for a future batter. The ‘whole’ nuts are used as decorators.”

Which lead to, “neither of the nuts are ‘better or more valuable’ than the other. Both are needed to make the fruitcake.”

So, why isn’t it that way with humans?

Why is it that we as a society marginalize or shun those that we deem “broken”? I’m talking about the elderly, the physically/emotionally/developmentally disabled and those that are part of “Generation Alphabet” or any other generation that isn’t “ours”. Basically, “broken” is defined as “unlike myself”.

Why is it that we do the same based upon skin color, education level, income level, ethnicity, race or whatever means you use to “categorize” people? Who is it that decides who is “broken” and who is “whole”? Society? Those in “power”? Tell me, “who”?

What is wrong with us? Why do we do this? Must we do this?

Shouldn’t every single person matter? Doesn’t every single person matter?

God placed each and every one of us on this “little blue planet” for a reason. Each and every one of us – no matter our color, beliefs, etc…we were all placed here for a reason.

Seems there’s always “chatter” about “making the world whole”, but we’re all just standing around waiting for “someone else” to do it. Or maybe we’re being told “it needs to be done this way, but not that way” and “include this, but not that”.

Really? You think THAT’S going to work?? Doesn’t “whole” mean “everything, everyone, complete, in its entirety”?  Did I miss something?

Well, I’m here to tell you…it needs and must begin with you.

How are you going to change who & what society has told you you are?

When are you going to start? Right now? Tomorrow? Or are you going to “take a few days to think about it”, then never think about it and NEVER get started?

I saw this quote from Peter N. Nielsen on Facebook –

“Maybe the journey isn’t so much about becoming anything. Maybe it’s about unbecoming everything that isn’t you so you can finally be who God meant you to be in the first place.”

My response –

“Let the journey begin!”

As a kid growing up, my dad always responded with “Why?” and “What for?” whenever I asked him for money. If I was unable to provide satisfactory responses to those questions, well then, I wouldn’t get the money.

Going to mom for money, most of the time, was met with “go see your father”; so yet another dead end.

It really seemed unfair at the time, but as I grew up I began to realize he was teaching me not only the value of a dollar but also the difference between “Want” and “Need”.

I believe the understanding of the difference between “Want” and “Need” is lacking in today’s society. Shocking, I know!

We are surrounded by rampant consumerism. We are hounded by ads in print, radio and television telling us we must have the latest and greatest version of smartphone or automobile. Americans carry huge credit debt causing many to live paycheck to paycheck; mortgaging “later” for “now”. We ask “What’s the monthly payment?” and straight-up ignore the total overall cost.

As my dad would ask, “Why?” “What for?”

That got me to thinking –

“When I pray, am I praying for things I want or things I need?”

“Is God’s response somehow “based” upon whether it is a “want” or a “need”? Does it matter as God answers all prayer?

I think the Rolling Stones said(sang) it the best…

“No, you can’t always get what you want
You can’t always get what you want
You can’t always get what you want
But if you try sometime you find
You get what you need…”

The most difficult thing to do in life is to accept failure; which is funny, because we fail at life every day. Why is it that we take such a negative view of failure?

About six weeks ago I was fired from my job. Apparently, I had failed to live up to the company’s “performance metrics” for my position. Now mind you, it wasn’t because I couldn’t perform the duties of my job, I just didn’t perform them to the standards the company established.

Honestly, being fired was a relief. A HUGE relief. I had been unhappy for quite some time, but chose to continue the daily battle because the job was close to home and the money good – both “good” reasons – but not the “best” reasons to stay. After 14 years, I had lost my “best reason”.

Being fired provided the “kick in the butt” I obviously required to make the change I so desperately needed. Thank goodness God has a long leg & a big foot!

Currently I am employed as a “temp to hire” at an abbey. Yes, an abbey! I work for and with monks, primarily filling and shipping their internet fruitcake orders. Now that the holidays are passed, I’ll be assisting in the bakery with the actual baking of the fruitcakes. On the days we’re not baking I’ll be assisting in the labeling department – removing labels from wine bottles or waxing the corks in the bottles.

I waxed corks for the first time the day after Christmas. The actual process is simple – fill this funnel-like doohickey with melted wax, hold doohickey over the top of the corked wine bottle, pull trigger on doohickey which starts wax flowing, release trigger when cork covered, repeat several hundred times.

Easy, right? A trained monkey (no pun intended) could do it…right?

Wrong! Dead wrong!

Now maybe, just maybe, I had some difficulty getting this task “figured out” because I have no depth perception – I kept missing the top of the bottle! I was holding the doohickey either too far past or not near enough the top of the bottle. I was failing. And failing often at a simple task. And I was frustrated, very frustrated.

Then encouragement arrived from my co-worker Pedro. He simply said “Don’t worry about it. It’s wax. When it cools down you can peel it off the bottles and try again. No worries. We have lots of wax.”

So, I went back to waxing bottles. And I continued to struggle. I continued to get upset when I missed the mark. Then I realized something – while Pedro had given me permission to fail, I had not given MYSELF the same permission.

Giving yourself permission to fail is freeing. It meant I didn’t have to be PERFECT. It means YOU don’t have to be perfect. Humans are not perfect beings. Really, we’re not.

Giving yourself permission to fail allows you the opportunity to make & correct your mistakes. You just have to take the actions required to repair the damage. Sure, in this instance, pulling the wax off the bottles is easy, but the “fix” won’t always be quite that simple.

For example, repairing broken relationships takes time and effort. It may require getting out of your comfort zone and into theirs. It may require patience and understanding.

But you know what? You can do it. You CAN fix it. Why? Because you’re not perfect and neither are they. Because you’ve given yourself permission to fail and thus the opportunity to recover.

So, as you look back at the year that has passed and forward to the new year that is ahead ask yourself:

“Have I given myself permission to fail?”

“What do I want to accomplish with this permission?”

Then, go and do just that.

You have permission.

“Clap you hands.”

“Stomp your feet”

“Shout Amen”

Sorry, had a flashback of childhood memories there…I bet you did too!

Happiness.

Why is it so fleeting? Does it necessarily need to be so? Why is it that when you’re happy, other people try to “bring you down”, try to “steal your happiness” or “burst your bubble”?

How can someone “share your happiness”?  Dang it. It’s MY happiness, I don’t want to share! Get your own!

I’m a huge fan of the “Peanuts” cartoon created by Charles  M. Schulz. When I was a kid I bought his book “Happiness Is A Warm Puppy”. It’s Charlie Brown and the gang sharing their wisdom; telling us that, basically, it’s the simple every day things that make us the happiest. 

Think about that for a second. 

“It’s the simple, every day things that make us the happiest.”

Do you think that’s true?  Do we often take the simple things in life for granted? And if so, does that mean we take our happiness for granted?

Happiness cannot simply be defined. It is many different things to many different people; which leads me to believe happiness is based on an individual’s perception of their environment filtered through their experiences and emotions. Oh, and let’s not forget the role of “expectation”.

Expectations are to be lived up to or exceeded. Once you’ve done that you’re allowed or supposed to be happy.  Disappointment usually follows close behind if expectations aren’t met. Simple.

I’m meandering a bit, but I have often wondered  just who’s expectations we are supposed to live up to. We all have our own expectations of what we desire. Toss in the expectations of our parents, grandparents, brothers, sisters, friends and co-workers and we all have quite the load to carry! Am I not right?

Let’s make it real simple – because it’s “the simple every day things that make us the happiest”…

Ask yourself  – “what does God expect from me?” Or maybe “what are God’s expectations for my life?”

Can you disappoint God? 

———

Ok, I have no idea where to go from here. 

I wrote this originally on December 4. I put it aside hoping the words would come to me from out of the ether so that I could conclude this blog entry and have it posted by the 9th or 10th. It is now the 13th. 

No words have come.

So, I am going to post this “unfinished”. Maybe at some point, when the time is right, the words will arrive which will enable me to complete the entry; then again, maybe not. That is not for me to say. 

Like many other things in life, I am peacefully and thankfully placing this blog entry into God’s hands. It’s His “problem” now and I am more than sure He is more than capable of handling it.

And in that belief, I find happiness.

Life is full of them.  Sometimes it’s easy to tell when you’re “in the moment”. Sometimes you’re not aware how defining the moment is until it’s long gone and you’ve had time to look back and process that specific time in your life. Some “moments” you may never know.

I’ve previously written about a defining moment in my life – being struck by a golfball which caused a partial loss of vision in my left eye – and how that accident helped shape me into the person I am today.

But today I’m going to share a different “defining moment” in my life.  This “moment” occurred about three years ago.

Over the past 3 years I have told my employees that my honeymoon trip to Maui, Hawaii with Windy “broke me for life”. By that I don’t mean financially, but that the trip “broke” what I thought I knew about life, work and family. Okay, maybe it’s not quite correct to pinpoint the honeymoon, maybe it should include the entire “package of moments” which lead up to the trip…but does it matter? I think not.

Fundamentally,  I feel like what I thought I knew about those three things no longer “fit” or “made sense”.  How can that be?

I think one single word can explain it – priority.

A wise lady once said, “When all is said and done and you’re lying there in your casket; your car, house and fancy belongings you just had to have and worked so hard for won’t be there. What will be there are the people and relationships that you have made. What are you doing in your life to ensure you’re not lying there all alone?”

Whoa!!

Okay, if you haven’t figured it out, the wise lady is my wife Windy. And she made quite the point! In her own unique way she made me question my priorities.

I think up to that time I was “busy” chasing “things and stuff”. I worked hard so I could afford the creature comforts and to heck with friends and family. Something had to “give” so I can get what I want, right?

Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong, in so many ways. Again. WRONG!

Yes, work is important. It provides for the necessities in life – food, clothing, shelter etc. BUT, it shouldn’t be or become your “everything”.

Time away from work (I believe it’s called ‘vacation’), is required too! Time to decompress from the stresses and strains associated with work is also good for the body.’Vacation’ is generally a time for rest, a time to catch up with friends and family, a time to travel and make memories that will last a lifetime and more.  Oh, but most importantly it’s the chance to cross a few items off your “honey do” list! (Right fellas?)

Nowadays, I think the fancy term for all of this is  “work/life balance”.

And THAT, my friends, is what I began to struggle with after returning from Maui.

Work had always been #1. Examples –

What? Someone called in? Sure. I can cover the shift. I don’t need to be at the birthday party.

You need someone to work the holiday? Okay, sure. It’s double time, right?  They’ll save me a plate of food.

That was me, before.

Afterwards, I kinda learned the word “No”. I started looking out for myself and the family. In other words, I made them a priority. Okay, not “a priority” but “THE priority” in my life.

It wasn’t easy. It meant being a little less generous and kind when a co-worker asked to swap shifts or was a planning a vacation that overlapped with mine and wanted met to cut mine short. It meant standing up for myself when holiday schedules were being made.

And it was worth it.

Worth my coworkers not speaking to me.

Worth all the memories created when playing games with my kids and grandkids; whether it be a sleep-over, the  holidays or on an entire family (kids, grandkids, grandma & grandpa Windy & I) vacation.

Worth building relationships that will carry me through the difficult times in life.

So, all of this brought to mind a book (and movie) titled “Brian’s Song”.  In it,the  great Chicago Bears running back and member of the Football Hall of Fame, Gale Sayers, declares,  “I am third. God is first, others are second, and I am third.”

Hmm…What about work? Where’s work?

It’s not there! It’s not a “top 3” priority, nor should it be.

Yup, guess you could call that realization a “defining moment”.