“Boundless”

Windy and I have the following plaque on the wall –

Seems pretty straightforward. You fall in love. Get married. Have children. You love them.  Your children fall in love.  Get married. Have children.  You love them, too. An endless cycle of love has started…or continued.

I got to thinking…Is it really that easy?  Where/how does all that love originate?  Why does love  seemingly expand at will? Can we ever run out of love?  How does love work?  Do we “love” simply because we are all part of a “family” and “have to” love everyone in that family? Is love learned?

Let’s look at this from a different angle…

You fall in love. Get married. Have no kids. Get divorced. You find love again. Get married again. Have no kids again. Get divorced again. Yet again, you fall in love. You get married, but this time it’s different. This time your spouse comes with adult children and their children.

Do you love them all instantly and vice versa? Should you? Does it matter?

Of course it matters; it goes without saying. At what point do you “start” loving everyone like they’re your own flesh and blood? How does that even happen? Trust me, it does happen. Every day it happens. Look around you, they’re out there – the “blended family”.

Or you could just ask me. I’m living the “different angle”.

There was no “definitive moment” for loving my kids (I don’t call them step-kids and they don’t call me step-dad) like they were my own flesh and blood. It “just happened” – over time and shared experience; each kid at their own pace.

Obviously, “something” happened which enabled my love to grow. Did the growth take effort? Did it take time?  Heck yes it did! Effort and time to get to know and understand what makes of them “tick”. Effort to discover their dreams and desires. Time to develop a shared trust and healthy respect.

Then again, there was also this…

When I met Windy her daughter Shannon was 7 or so months pregnant.  Since we had been dating about a month or so I figured Taylor’s birth would be an “immediate family occasion” and wasn’t expecting to be involved. Figured I’d get a text to let me know Shan and the baby were fine.

Oh, was I ever wrong. The day Taylor was born changed my life forever, in a good way. I not only got a text but a phone call asking that I come to the hospital. Now, I was living about 45 minutes away and was scheduled to work, but I jumped in my car  and drove as fast as I could.  I didn’t want to miss a single moment.

The second I held Taylor the strangest feelings came over me. Instantly, I believed I would do anything for her – even run through a brick wall if I must. It was one of the most amazing feelings I have ever had. Feelings I never knew even existed. Here was this tiny baby filling a space in my heart I never knew was empty.

How’d it happen?

Love expanded.

Author: Dan

I love words & enjoy the freedom of writing. I strive to find the exact word to convey not only my thoughts, but also my feelings. I desire to fill the paper with words much the same way an artist fills the canvas with paint. To me, writing is an art form. View all posts by Dan